Let there be light!

Another week and another of the challenges crossed off. As of this evening I am now officially a minister of the universal life church. I have received confirmation of this from the ordaining officer of said church…………

“Let it be known on this date that in accordance with the laws of the Universal Life Church Monastery, as ordaining officer, I, Brother Martin, do ordain you into our ministry. From this day forward, you are entitled to all of the rights of an ordained minister. You have the authority to perform marriages, baptisms, and all other ceremonies of the church. You are an independent minister of this church. This is a position that carries with it a burden of responsibility; please respect others and comply with the laws of the land.”

a hard copy (without the watermark) is on the way

If you want to find out a bit more about the church I have joined then you can check it out at http://www.themonastery.org/ . Other ministers of the church include 3 Beatles, Richard Branson and Joey from friends.

Becoming a minister was rather easy to do (just fill in an online form). But I have to admit that when it came to sorting it out I was a little uncomfortable about signing up as a minister as I am an atheist. Thankfully, the Universal Life Church is quite ok about this and is happy to allow me to be a Humanist minister and stick to the rules of the church which are essentially be nice to people and let them believe what they want.

It’s a little early to start performing wedding ceremonies (though I will be happy to perform these in future). So I celebrated my new calling by bringing a little light into the world – well, not the light of the lord, and not to the world in general but the light of nPower to my living room – by replacing the light switch.

4 down and 8 to go!

The last couple of months have been pretty busy so the challenges (and the blog) have had to take a bit of a back seat for a while. However, I now have just over a month to try and finish as many of them off as I can and it’s time to crack on. Looking at my overall progress for the year right now things are not looking great for getting a full set by new years eve – but I guess I just have to crack on and see what can be done.

Over the year I have been building up my baking skills (I would have like to have written “honing my baking skills” there but that may be overegging things a touch). This weekend it was time to complete challenge No 10 - Host a tea party where I have booked all the food. Thankfully we’re going with the conventional understanding of the term tea party “a formal, ritualised gathering for the small meal of afternoon tea” – rather than hosting the militant wing of the Grand Old Party.

 There's no way she's ever getting an invite to come round for a cuppa......

 

I'd rather have this lot!

The first snag was the venue – lack of space, chairs (and at the moment heating – my boiler is broken) ruled out my flat for the location. Thankfully Rosie and Mark kindly agreed to let me “host” the event at their house (they have a proper tea pot and table cloths too!!). The next was the timing – a tea party should be for afternoon tea but the only suitable time was 10:30am – so for the duration of the tea party Rosie and mark’s living room became the sovereign territory of Bhutan and the start time therefore technically 4:30pm – perfectly inside the afternoon tea zone.

 

Next thing to sort was what to bake – a little reading around suggested that cake, scones, biscuits and small sandwiches are all acceptable afternoon tea fare so foolishly I decided to make all of them. I started the baking on Friday evening by making a couple of Ciabatta loaves, cheese scones and shortbread. All went fine until I melted part of the cooker hood – but am sure I will be able to find a replacement part for that. Then on Saturday I made a Victoria sponge cake (my first proper sandwich cake) and returned to an old favourite in lemon drizzle cake, slightly modified to include apples from my parent’s and Penny’s gardens. Spreading the butter icing on the sponge cake was trickier than I expected but by 9:30 on Saturday evening all was prepared (and my kitchen looked like a bomb site).

 Ciabatta

Shortbread fingers

The tea party itself went very well, attended as it was by Rosie, Mark, Astrid, Oscar, Penny, Luke and Archie- thanks for all turning out guys :-). Mark and Rosie let me use some of their v nice china crockery and helped set everything out wonderfully (sorry the photo doesn’t do the set up justice – the light wasn’t great for photos), Mark was even about to get the iron out for the table cloth at one point. The baking went down well and everyone was very complimentary about what I’d made – looks like I’ve managed to pick up baking reasonably well. More important than how the food went down it was really great to have a get together and a natter, not something we get to do very often.

 Rosie and Penny and the afternoon tea spread

Astrid tucking in to some Victoria sponge - Oscar wasn't quite so interested :-)

 

So that’s another challenge off the list. 4 down (well 5 if you include this blog) still a way to go but we’ll see how I get on. Just because the challenge is done doesn’t mean I’m going to stop baking now – I’ve had great fun learning and it’s something I’ll keep on doing – though maybe not trying to bake so many things simultaneously!

Ukulele

After the rather depressing blog about the Lakeland 50 its time to get back to the properly agreed challenges. A few people have pointed out that I’m a little behind on things and need to get my arse in gear. So, inspired by Jenny and Carli, I have begun trying to learn a musical instrument (challenge 7) – in this case a Ukulele.

My record for musical ability is not great. Apart from the compulsory recorder lessons while I was at middle school I have attempted to learn the trumpet (mostly as my dad can play one), this lasted a couple of years and I didn’t even get to grade one. I also spent a couple of years learning to play the piano, I had a bit more success with that but still struggled and eventually gave up. Plus anyone who has seen my music collection (or more precisely my lack of one) will attest to the fact that I don’t have much of a sophisticated musical taste.

A quick bit of internet based research helped me select a Kala Uke as a nice cheap option (but with a good sound quality according to the reviews). I went on amazon and purchased a Kala MK-SN Soprano (their entry level Uke) and a bag to carry it for £35. The reviews online explained that the strings it came with were not so great and that to get a decent quality sound new ones (Aquila) would be a good purchase so off I trooped to Windows (music shop in Newcastle) to buy some. I have to say I enjoyed going to a music shop and buying bits for my new instrument – staff were great and were impressed with my choice – found the right strings for me and then sold me a starter pack with some beginners books and a few other bits and pieces apparently essential for a new Uke owner.

 

 

My Uke! and my absolute beginners book on how to play it - (i did check if they had one called Ukuele for ten thumbed tallentless absolute beginners in the shop but alas not)

 

Everything went fine until I got everything home and tried to change the strings – getting the old ones off was easy but attaching the new ones somewhat harder. 45 minutes of struggling a light swearing later and I had one string attached but so lose no note could be coaxed from it! I needed help – my first thought was my downstairs neighbours but then I remembered that a lad I work with play base and might be able to help.

So the Uke got taken back into work and handed over to Ross while I was in a meeting. He was supposed to leave one string until I came back to show me how it was done. Alas, my PhD student found him later and since she has 4 Ukes insisted on completing the job and seeing how it sounded. So stringing the thing is still a mystery – but I have been offered cheap lessons and even had an invitation to join a band.

Now the strings are all on I’ve had a chance to start trying to play – just learning the basics of strumming at the moment and 6 of the easiest chords. Have got onto the first tune the book suggests – for the time being my rendition is not recognisable but I am having fun trying – so thank you to whoever suggested this one!

Lakeland 50: To DNS or DNF?*

*For non-runners DNF = did not finish, DNS = did not start

I initially wrote this post in the bar of the Sun Hotel, Coniston 27/7/13 on a note pad purchased in a local souvenir shop to be typed up at a later date (with some additional bits added that I’ve recalled since then and some of the more embarrassing typos removed).

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I’ve just had to pull out of the Lakeland 50 after approximately 4 miles and the term gutted doesn’t quite cover it. In order to prevent myself from wallowing in self-pity for the afternoon I thought I’d take the unexpected free time to write something for the blog. For pretty good reasons “pull out of an ultra-marathon after only 4 miles” did not make it on the list of challenges but as this is the first time I’ve ever DNF’d in any sort of a race, let alone an ultra-marathon, it qualifies as being out of my comfort zone!

What was different this time? Well I tried to run carrying an injury. Two weeks ago I pulled up in a training run due to cramp (it was a hot day and I wasn’t hydrated so it was my own fault). The cramp caused a few small muscle tears. “Something minor” I thought; “just see the physio then rest for a few days and it’ll be fine”. Six days later I went out for another run – just a light 2 miler – and it locked up again. There were now just seven days for it to clear up. A couple more trips to the physio followed and though he told me that “in an ideal situation you shouldn’t be running” he also said “it’ll be ok to give it a try so long as you don’t push too hard and you stop immediately if you feel the muscle start to go again”. This was all the encouragement I needed, especially as I said I would do the race with Sumanth, so I decided to go for it.

The fact is that, given the above and the nature of the race, it was pretty obvious what was going to happen – my leg would not last the distance – and deep down I already knew this.

One of the thoughts running through my head is should I have even started? Be a DNS rather than a DNF? DNS means no risk of additional injury and everyone understands that you had to withdraw. But withdrawing from a race beforehand is hard – especially one you’ve been training for ages, with a lot of sweat and pain invested as “this was the year you were going to rip the nuts off it!”. And deeper down none of us wants to give in before really knowing we couldn’t do it. Ultimately it's about risk versus ego – and ego usually wins.

After pulling out I was driven back to race HQ in a minibus with half a dozen 100 mile runners who had had to drop out through either injury or exhaustion (some could no longer walk) and some marshals one of whom (I’d met him briefly before at the Hardmoors 55 earlier in the year) decided that I needed reminding of the ultra-marathon facts of life…….

“You youngsters think you’re indestructible! You can’t expect never to be a DNF, these races are designed to be tough – that’s the whole point! Even the guys at the front have to pull out sometimes. The important part is to review what went wrong and get it right next time”.

…… I had the rest of the journey to reflect on this (and sulk a bit more if I’m honest)….. I knew he was right but it was still hard to take.

It’ll take about 2 weeks for the muscle tears to clear up properly, which will Ieave me plenty of time to train for next year. I’ll take Ultra Marathon Yoda’s advice in future, train smarter and not start races when injured. Though I reserve the right to throw another sulk if I have to DNF again!

 

It’s now nearly a month after I wrote that down – I’ve rested the leg and done my stretches. However, the first time I went back to running my calf went again. So I’ve been back to the Physio and am in the process of building a proper recovery programme (have also been told I was doing my stretching wrong!). Time to buy a bike – but I will be back doing ultras next year!

Challenge 3 completed

I can cross another of the challenges off the list! Last week I went to Croatia for a research/appraisal meeting and as I’ve never visited before this counts as completeing challenge no? visit a new country. I kept a diary while I was there which ran to 10 pages of A5, probably a bit much to include here so I’ll summarise………

Day 1 – Tuesday 2nd of July (annoyingly 2 days after Croatia joined the EU so no stamp on passport!)
The flight out of Newcastle was at 6:15am so had an early start to get to the airport on time (4am) but thanks to an upgrade was let into the BA Business Lounge, a little early to take advantage of the free booze but the coffee was very welcome and bumped into Robson Green (on his way to Wimbledon apparently). First flight was a bit of a blur due to still being half asleep – the second one was a bit more of a raucous affair thanks to half a plane load of boozed up young London boys and girls on their way to a music festival – I think they’d already had a skinfull at the airport but they kept drinking on the journey and got loader and louder much to the irritation of the rest of the passengers and crew.

In one of those perfect bits of timing both of the loos at the back of the plane packed up leading to a large queue of party goers forming along the isle – made more amusing when we were held up for landing by the Croatian airforce doing some sort of exercise on the main runway. The festivelers continued to cause mayhem at the airport and did the reputation of brits abroad no good at all when one of them fell over and bashed his head on the baggage carousel – luckily for him he was so drunk he didn’t seem to feel a thing!

The journey from Zagreb to Reijka was pretty uncomfortable but we made it in 3 hours and I got the feeling back in my legs after about 30 minutes. Hotel was very nice but accidentally completed challenge number 1 again when the deputy manager decided to let herself into my room just I was I was getting out of the shower – much embarrassment all round!


Wednesday 3rd
The meeting/review lasted from 8 till 6 and I was last up to give a presentation so had the full time to fuss over my slides. My presentation went well though and was given the provisional thumbs up by the Commission representatives. Was hoping to have a little time off in the evening to see the town but we were whisked straight off to go for diner – as it turned out this was on a boat – the food was a little basic but the chef spent much of the time out on deck playing an accordion with the captain singing an accompaniment from the bridge – the drinks provided were, well……. Lets just say they had a lot of flavour!

We had some wonderful views as we cruised down the coast and were let off for 30 minutes while something (not sure what) was being done to the boat used this opportunity to pop into a local bar and find something a little more palatable. The cruise back to the hotel took a while so it was 1am when we made back – a little tipsy.

 

our chef/musician

 

 

Professor Rich Dawson "enjoying" the local wine



Thursday 4th
Was woken up by the maid letting herself into my room – this happened to others at the meeting also. It was off to more meetings until 3:30 but we got the afternoon to have a bit of a look at our surroundings – the town was very nice and felt a bit Italian (understandable given how close we were to the border) it was very hot and many people weren’t wearing very much – there’s a time and a place for speedos – its in Olympic swimming competitions – not major shopping streets!!

 

a bit later on - when everyone had put theur clothes back on

The organisers had invited those that were flying back the following day for another meal out this time in a restaurant overlooking the town – with instructions to meet in a nearby castle. Had a lovely meal and got to know some of the EU people a bit better. Lots of national stereotypes came out and were being made fun of – this included me and Rich being criticised for trying to change the funding rules but my personal favourite was when the greek representative phoned up the French organiser (Theirry) to say he was at the entrance but he couldn’t pay for his taxi as he didn’t have any of the local currency, at which point Thierry asked a chap called Ernst to go to the entrance and pay for the cab – then picked the phone up and said “don’t worry, I’m sending the Germans to bail you out”

view from the terrace in the first bar

Friday 5th
Another early start and a near sense of humour failure in Zagreb airport (nice staff but bit of a shambles). The journey home took about 10 hours and was knackered when I got home. To be fair I didn’t see a lot of Croatia but I got a bit of a taste of it and it was my first trip to the region – wouldn’t be the sort of place I’d go on holiday (not really a coast/sunbathing sort of person) but enjoyed having a few days there.

A much delayed update

The last entry was the 14^th of April, so much for my plan to blog about once a week! Let’s get the excuses out of the way.

i)                    I was abducted by aliens

ii)                   I forgot how to type

iii)                 I broke the internet

iv)                 I got abducted by aliens again

v)                  I poisoned myself with my own baking

vi)                 I’ve just been a bit crap at sitting down at the computer and doing a bit of typing

You’ll have to decide for yourself which of the above statements are true

I have been making (some) progress on the challenges in the mean time (in between the alien abductions) so it seems fitting that this blog is review of progress against them all, so here goes…………..

1)      Public Nudity

Done – see blog entry “excuse me mate but you’ve nicked my towel” 10^th of Feb. May be revisited in future though.

2)      Pull in a strange place

Going to be careful what I put here – There have been a couple of near misses on this (see entries on 27^th of Feb and 7^th April). There have been other developments but I don’t really want to blog about them just yet as I need to see how things go - plus not sure if the girl in question would be too thrilled to have the whole thing reported on here!

3)      Visit a new country

I’ll be doing this twice (country not continent). I’m visiting Croatia in July and Romania in October – I may also try to get to Slovenia over the summer.

4)      Get a motorcycle or skydiving licence

I did quite a bit of research into this and it’s looking like it will be tricky one to achieve – either of these two options is going to cost in excess of £2k for the training! – I’ve just spent quite a lot of money on my flat and whilst this is affordable I am looking to move in about 12 months, I’m going to need all the savings I can muster at that point.

I’ve therefore had to ask the adjudicating panel (comprising Nick, Laura, and Kate) for some leniency and they have kindly offered a fall back of “learn a craft” (i.e. pottery or basket making). If its possible to do the original challenge as planned then I will try to do so (as it is a bit more exciting than basket weaving!)

5)      Participate in a team sport

Zero progress on this, though I may be joining a netball team.

6)      Set up and update a blog about the challenges

Despite the odd gap I have managed to keep the blog going so should be able to make it to the end of the year.

7)      Learn a musical instrument

I’ve had a number of offers of assistance on this – from the loan of a guitar to joining a chorus line (joining a choir was allowed under the rules). Am working on a plan with one of the chaps at work but will keep a lid on things till the plan come to fruition and there’s something to report.

8)      Get a poem published in the Evening Chronicle

I’ve had a few goes at writing poems now – but have not managed more than a verse and they are frankly just too awful/embarrassing to post here! Nevertheless I’m confident I can write something that approximates poetry.

The hard part will be getting it published as as far as I can see the Evening Chronicle doesn’t publish poems!!!! I’m going to have to trick the editor somehow!

9)      Join and participate in an amateur dramatics society

Done absolutely nothing on this

10)   Host a tea party where you have baked all the food

Learning how to bake has involved quite a few failure (some of which I am yet to report) but am making steady progress. I can now confidently bake 2 different types of cake, scones, multiple breads (I’ve really bread making – and deeply grateful to whoever suggested this one – sorry I can’t remember as I was little drunk by the time we got to double figures on the challenges). My cookie making however is an area of concern and my flapjacks have been an utter disaster!

Despite the setbacks I think I can do this one quite soon. All that remains is to set the date for this but am confident of completion.

11)   Ride a horse

Hopefully going to be doing this with Beccy sometime over the summer as it’s one of her challenges to. The preferred location is Coniston in the lakedistrict.

12)   Become an ordained minister of a religious group or cult

I have found a suitable religion that is prepared to ordain me. I have also been asked to perform a marriage – though this will take place next year. All that remains is to choose my title (reverend, padre, rabi, llama) – suggestions welcomed in the comments box.

Ok, looking through all that it does appear that 6 months in I can only claim that one challenge is complete but this is a marathon not a sprint and, well, I am a marathon runner! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2TRUUu2uHo&noredirect=1)

Kitchen disasters

A very quick update on challenge 10. I've been trying to expand my range a bit over the last month or so and have been having a go at cookies and flapjacks. These are supposed to be easy and as I've now been loaned a copy of "The Great British Book of Baking" endorsed by Mary Berry and Paul Hollywood of BBC fame I was pretty confident of making some quite nice things.

Unfortunatley even the King and Queen of TV baking can't stop me from making a bit of a hash of things the first time around (to be fair, the cookie recipies I tried weren't theirs, just the flapjack one).

Anyway the results can be seen below...........

Cookie attempt 1: chocolate chip cookies a little dry and doughy but ok (and a loaf of bread

on the right, which worked much better)

 

 

Cookie attempt 2: Crispy chocolate chip cookies - a bit too much sugar and they all merged into one big sheet - still got scoffed by the guys at work though.

 

 

Cookie attempt 3: crispy cookies take 2 - still spread out quite a lot but atleast they didn't all merge, still far too sugary for my liking.

 

 

Flapjack attempt 1: what a bloody mess! probably shouldn't have tried to make two different types in the same tray but was expecting it all to fall apart so easily - will see what's salvagable and take to work tomorrow.